Massive Security Blog Consolidation Underway: RationalSecurity to Acquire “StillSecure After All These Years” Blog
BOSTON MA, March 3 /PRNewswire/ - Rational Security
BlogoDomination Corp. (RSBC) announced its intention
today to continue the expansion of its consolidation
strategy in the overly saturated Security Blog Market
with the unsolicited hostile takeover bid and acquisition
of Alan Shimel's "StillSecure After All These Years
(SSAATY)" Blog.
Christofer Hoff, CEO and Dark Overlord of the Security
Blogsolidation Dominion, today announced that upon
release of SSAATY's recent earnings report showing a
marked uptake in revenues with income hovering at over
$18 per month, that RSBC would offer an unheard of 20X
revenue multiplier in a stock-for-stock exchange and
an "I (heart) NAC" bumper sticker.
Alan Shimel, SSAATY's CEO/CTO/CMO/CIO/CFO/CSO refused
comment other than to crisply and vehemently reject
Hoff's bid citing unacceptable terms; balking at only a
20X multiplier, he pointed to Ken Xie's $4B sale of
NetScreen to Juniper and suggested that Hoff "...get real if he expects this bulls**t
takeover attempt to warrant any sort of attention other than a trackback and lower
Technorati rating."
Art Coviello, CEO of RSA, complemented his prognostications from his recent 2007 RSA
Security Conference keynote wherein he stated that there would there not be any
independent security companies in 3 years, and Hoff's RSBC would "...subsume all
security blogs within the same timeframe." Mike Rothman was quoted as "...not giving
a crap because neither of them purchased a copy of the P-CSO."
Hoff's response was just as shrill, "If Shimel doesn't pony up like the little bitch
that he is, I'll buy his lap dog Mitchell's blog instead."
Contact:
Christofer Hoff Alan Shimel
CEO and Dark Overlord of the Security CEO/CTO/CMO/CIO/CFO/CSO
Blogsolidation Dominion StillSecure After All These Years
satanwithacheckbook@packetfilter.com finallygotanexit@stillsecureafteralltheseyears.com
Categories: Current Affairs, General Rants & Raves
StillSecure, After all these years to resist hostile takeover attempt by (ir)Rational Security blog
After a meeting of the managing board of StillSecure, After all these years blog, including the CEO, CTO, CMO, CIO, CFO and the CSO, Alan Shimel who holds all of these positions at StillSecure, After all these years blog, has
All Your Blog Are Belong To Us!
Resistance is futile, Alan.
/Hoff
It's Time for an Exit Strategy
With all this hostile blog takeover talk today at Rational Security and Still Secure After All These
It's heartless, titans of capitalism like you, Hoff, that give security bloggers a bad name!
– Mitchell
It’s Time for an Exit Strategy
With all this hostile blog takeover talk today at Rational Security and Still Secure After All These
It's true. I don't give a crap, but not because neither of you bought the P-CSO. I actually sent pre-release copies to you jokers and I'm pretty sure YOU (yes, you Mr. Hoff) have not publicly posted on how great it is.
But I know some private equity guys, so if you need to line up some financing for your blog roll-up idea, let me know. I can get access to $1K or so pretty quickly. That should give you the firepower to acquire the top 20 security blogs.
Notice to all blog takeover pirates
ANNOUNCEMENT: In an effort to thwart the impending plague of hostile takeover actions imminent in the security blogging marketplace, I am announcing the following preemptive measures to ensure TheConvergingNetwork.com faithful will enjoy reading about …
Chris,
ROFL LOL and all those acronyms. That was absolutely side-splitting. Thank you for that.
Michael
DAMNED funny. Hats off! Kudos for the Gekko screencap.
to have a blog up and say you cannot be hacked, is pretty crazy lol. Great article.
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